i hope you can’t seem to get me out of your mind also

why is our conversation only flowing when you want it to be flowing? why’d you ignore my texts when i clearly see you on instagram seeing my stories and on other group chats. why do you put our conversation to an end when i still want to talk to you, even though i have nothing to say to you. i know you’re mr. popular and every time you go on Line a bunch of messages pop up and you only reply to the recent ones, the ones you only want to reply to. and that’s not me, that’s never me, only when you need something from me. you got me staring at my phone waiting for a reply that i know will never come unless i pop up another conversation. i’m never going to chat you first again, in a million ages. even if i have something to say, even if i found something and i want to share it to you. i don’t want to make this that sort of conversation. but maybe, he’s just not that into me. and i have to face the truth. but i hope you too can’t get me out of your mind. and i still hate you how we only talk when you need to talk, when you need advice from me, when you need help from me. and it’s never the other way around, when i need you to be there. why am i sitting here stupidly waiting for you to need me. and hoping for you to greet me first because i miss you but i don’t want to be the first one to start a conversation. i want us to be that sort of go-to person to tell everything about their day and not seem clingy or uninterested. i want that to be with you honestly, and i can see it too. can we…